Thursday Thoughts:
Back to real life. It wasn’t all a dream. It appears that I am indeed married. Everything happened so fast that it seems unreal. Any moment now I’ll wake up from the dream and be back to what I had been used to for 27 plus some years of my life – single, carefree, perhaps even careless. Then again, every day has passed since, and I’m still married. Weird! Maybe that movie inception still has me messed up. For sure that movie has messed me up.
I don’t feel like a different person, but I feel a tremendous internal pressure that I’m somehow supposed to be. Somehow I’m supposed to be this amazing wife who is all of a sudden tidy and organized, cooks feasts for her husband, is hospitable to all the guests she has over, and the list can go on for miles. I even cooked my first recipe from my first recipe book my girlfriends gave me as a wedding gift. Mom’s cucumber recipe. And I even cleaned the bathroom in such an OCD manner. These things are all very uncharacteristic of me, and I don’t feel like myself.
I can’t quite figure out what’s bugging me. I’ve been up late at night with a million questions running through my head all pointing back to that big “who am I?” Maybe I’m afraid of failing as a good wife and who knows why I’m worrying about this even before this new chapter has really started. Worrying is also very uncharacteristic of me, because I tend to pretend the stress just isn’t there. Man, this is going to be one scary, new chapter of my life. Correction: Our lives.
Well, enough about my thursday thoughts. Thought I’d deliver them with some beautiful photos from Fiji. Oh, how I miss Fiji. And this wonderful couple whom we had the great pleasure to shoot!
Here’s Hayley and Ross:
